Here is a new and interesting take on the life of someone unemployed. I know many of you will relate. The rest of this post was written by an anonymous submitter.
6:46- Wake up even though the alarm clock is never on anymore-later than usual and regardless of the time you went to bed.
6:48-Lay there and decide if it was all a bad dream; then realize that unfortunately it was not. Be brought to alert state by rising concerns.
7:00- Get up slowly, throw on whatever (it doesn’t really matter, probably workout clothes), make the bed, talk to the dogs, reviewing the sleep patterns of the night-out loud to the dogs. Realize they cannot answer.
7:15-Check the various devices, shocked NOT to see the usual 100 + emails and issues awaiting you. Just a few ads and emails from the few people that still think your opinion matters. Touch base with your adorable daughter. Miss her. Feel proud of all that she is despite your own myriad failures.
8:00-Take the dogs out slowly and walk them longer than usual. The dogs like this. Notice people, leaves, bugs, workers, cracks in the sidewalk, and finger marks on doors that you never noticed before. The dogs like this too. Give them each a little kiss as they lick your ankles.
8:30-(this can be switched with 9:00) Make and eat a yummy breakfast of eggs and tomatoes, and tea. Take your time. Wash up. Read your daily intentions as you have for at least 20 years, and wonder why none of them seem to be true just now.
9:00- Exercise (jog) for at least a half hour. Actually have time to sweat, stretch, and think, while listening to music. This part is pretty cool. Wonder why you ever let this go. Would things have turned out differently if you had stayed in shape?
9:30-Notice the freckles and moles on arms and legs. Good God, when did so many appear?
10:00-Shower, or not yet. Maybe surf the web for a while. Watch the Today Show. Think how cool it would be to wake up in NYC. See if adorable daughter has responded, maybe send her another text. In the shower, take your time. Open your mouth and say AHHHH as the drops gurgle into your throat. Put whatever clothes on that you want. No makeup at all.
11:00- Look for and apply to jobs. Take several hours for this. Feel alternate rage, fear, frustration, excitement, hope, and confusion. In between, surf the web, or check in with the TV. The TV has become your greatest ally. See your life as a TV drama, and pretend it will have a happy TV ending. Realize that TV distracts, informs, amuses, and generally assures you that you are still part of the human race. Schedule any Skype or phone call interviews. Do them as scheduled, not having to dress from the waist down for Skype. Find this amusing.
3:00- Cook. Take your time. Make the best “from scratch” tomato sauce with chicken that you have ever seen. Feel like Julia Childs. Remember that she failed many times (but always had a rich husband; you don’t).
4:00-Shop like you have money to spend. Feel guilty because you have no money to spend. Rediscover the library. All that stuff for free. God Bless them.
4:30-Get into the blame game. Blame your x-employer, everyone around him, your x-spouse, the government, your parents, your extended family, and your “would-be” friends who must have betrayed you, and your age and your health. They will all be sorry one day. Hate everyone and everything, and wonder what you did to deserve this terrible fate. Feel fear. Blame yourself, which is the scariest blame of all. Realize that you love to play the victim, and how that is so lame. You really are a jerk, and deserve all of this. Knock it off. Realize that blame and guilt are USELESS. Never blame the dogs.
5:00- Walk the dogs again. They like this. Sit in the sun with them. Forget what day it is. Actually forget what day it is. This seems impossible. Is it normal or are you losing your mind?
5:30- Enjoy your sauce. Write pages in your journal about how you feel. Clean, do a wash, read, whatever you feel like doing. Get a little bit scared. Look at the bank account. Pay bills. Calculate for the 25th time how long your money will last. Recalculate. Realize that you are OK for 6 months. Don’t believe it. Recalculate.
6:30-Back on computer and job searching. More TV; in fact TV is on more than not.
6:40-Fold laundry; maybe even iron. Imagine that- you have not ever ironed when employed. Maybe this doesn’t completely suck. Start to pack for some interviews that are more than a week away. Yes, I said more than a week away.
7:00-Think about going to the very most remote village in the world and teaching war torn children, or any other career that actually means something in this world. Realize that this is a big opportunity to become NEW. EMBRACE THAT!
8:00-Check in with the adorable daughter or wonderful sibling who has been there just like me, and keeps my head on straight. Hear from the other good sibling whose husband has been there too.
NOTE: Of course, there are occasional social engagements interspersed; however it is quickly realized that most of your social life had something to do with the people connected to work, and seeing any of them is impossible right now…. Your life seems to have vanished into thin air….
9:00- Walk the dogs. They like this. Stop electronic devices. Eat yogurt which works as a sleeping pill. Drink a boatload of water. More TV, more reading, more fear. Despise commercials. Feel they are numbing your brain. They are. Find new appreciation and understanding of the phrase “couch potato”.
11:00- Go to bed because sleep is a relief from all this, although you may have bad dreams. Feel the fear; it sets in at night. Be glad the dogs are there. You are not completely alone. Wish they could talk. Talk for them.
Somewhere realize that things could change, things must change, and things will change….soon.