Joining me today is author and entrepreneur Jaime Villalovos, who recently released her book Happy and Strong: Create Your Dream While Life Enjoying the Journey. It discusses how she became a seven-figure business owner before the age of thirty all while raising a family. I’ll be chatting with her today about that journey and advice she has for the rest of us.
Nicole: First, thank you for taking the time to talk with me! What do you see as something that is a major challenge for a lot of women right now?
Jamie: Well, obviously, there is still a big income disparity between maIes and females. Women have a harder time starting businesses because it’s much harder for them to receive funding. For those that do work or have a business, I see a lot of women struggling to find balance between their career and their personal/family life. They want to be able to “have it all,” but they are not sure how they can. This is especially true for moms because they experience a lot of that “mommy guilt.” When they’re working, they’re distracted because they wonder if they should be home with their kids and when they are home, they wonder if they are neglecting their work. This is something I experienced myself with my first child, so I can definitely relate. I love sharing the things that have helped me to be able to juggle everything and still be effective as a mom, wife, and business owner.
Nicole: How do you find that balance between life and work?
Jaime: There is no such thing as perfect balance, only striving for balance and happiness. There will be times when you are working hard toward a big goal in business and you are off-balance; other times a family member may be going through something hard and you are off-balance in the other direction. I believe that family comes first, and your business is just an extension of who you are and what you stand for. Most people live their lives in the opposite way. They have a job and everything in their life has to revolve around that.
You have to make your priorities a priority! I have four F’s. Faith, Family, Fitness and Finance. Identify your priorities! As you dream and create goals for the life you desire, make sure to set short- and long-term goals in each of these four areas. As I read my goals and plans each day, it rebalances me. I read my short- and long-term goals for my marriage, my business, savings and family. I get excited, refocused, and it keeps me from getting too off-balance.
Schedule the most important things first. I call these my “non-negotiables.” These are things like weekly family time. Where you spend your time, dictates where your heart is. The most important priorities in your life should go in your schedule first – date nights, mommy dates, church and family time, fitness, personal development and self care. Once you’ve made sure those things are all in the calendar, then you can work like crazy without the mommy guilt feelings. Now you can fill your calendar with important work/business appointments, meetings, and tasks that need to get done to move the needle and grow your company.
Learn to take things off your plate that are not growing you, your company, your family or any of the other priority areas like your faith and wellness. Women have a harder time saying no sometimes. We tend to take on more than we should. Women will say things like, “If it’s going to get done right, then I will just do it myself.” Or, “I can just get it done faster if I do it myself.” As women, we have a hard time delegating and we take on more than we should. This causes us to burn out. We spread ourselves too thin. If you are going to add something to your busy plate, be willing to take something else off.
Don’t feel bad if it takes some time to get adjusted. Like I said, this happened to me too. When my oldest, Daisy, was about 18 months old, I was really struggling with the mommy guilt. I had started my business when I was 22 years old and single, so my schedule was a lot different. But when I became a mom, I started feeling like I wasn’t spending enough time with her and that I should be home more. I struggled and thought maybe balance was unattainable. It really started taking a toll. I battled with the nagging distraction in my mind, “Am I doing what’s right for my family? Am I doing what’s right for me? Is it OK that I want more? Is it selfish to keep chasing new, bigger dreams?”
When you feel stressed or anxious about your work/life balance try creating a new schedule that you are comfortable with. Just keep tweaking it and tweaking until it feels right. You’ll know that it’s right for you when you feel at peace again. I have four children now. As our family grew, I just kept tweaking and making the adjustments. You’re going to go through different seasons in your life and your business. There will never be perfect balance, but you can always strive to find your own sense of balance. No matter the challenges, you can grow past them to become who you were meant to be.
Nicole: This is helpful advice! For women who feel like they aren’t doing enough or feel like they are spinning their wheels, what’s your advice?
Jaime: This can be rough. One of the keys to happiness is progression. You need to feel like you are growing. First, I would say, You are enough. It will always feel like it isn’t happening fast enough if you are a driven woman. However, there is a difference between being busy and frustrated, stressed out and anxious and being busy and fulfilled. First, get clarity on what you really want in life. What does your ideal life look like?
Then take a close look at where you’re spending your time and if that aligns with what you really want. Sometimes you don’t have to work on doing more, you can just work on being more effective. If you don’t have a planner, get one. Start plugging in your schedule. If you feel like you aren’t doing enough, use your planner to be more effective and productive with your time. Again, schedule the most important things first, but also identify what are the tasks that will actually help you grow. What are the income-generating activities that need to be a part of your daily routine? What do you need to stop doing or delegate to make more time for meaningful things?
I would also recommend eliminating any time wasters – anything that doesn’t serve you. If you really want to have it all, then you have to focus on what’s most important. If it doesn’t grow my faith, family, or business, then I don’t do it. I only have 24 hours in the day. On top of being a business owner, I am also a wife and a mother of 4. I don’t have time to waste.
Last, I would encourage you to figure out what you are passionate about. Be involved in charity or service. I know you probably think I’m crazy because you already have too much on your plate, but when you are serving others or you are engaged in a good cause, you will feel more fulfilled. Focusing on others (not just our business, clients and family) will bring more meaning to your life. You won’t be feeling like you are just spinning plates.
Nicole: Tell us a bit about your new book.
Jaime: To tell you the truth, I really hadn’t planned to write a book. The Happy & Strong book was born from seeing the sadness and stress during the covid pandemic. We are now more unhappy as a nation than we have been in over 50 years. There is record divorce, suicide, anti-depressant use, alcoholism and domestic violence. There was overwhelming stress on women. This book will help others learn how to build their dream business and life and have joy in the journey. Over the years, I have coached so many entrepreneurs – both men and women – to be able to build and run successful six- and seven-figure businesses without neglecting the other important areas of their life, like their faith or their family. I’ve seen what a difference it makes. After all, what’s the point of working so hard to win in your career but your marriage fails, or your kids won’t talk to you? Or if you make millions only to end up sick, stressed, and unhappy?
Now my passion is really helping others to be able to achieve success in all areas of their life. I want to share the tools and resources that I’ve learned to be able to create my philosophy on winning, which is “Happy & Strong.” This book is something I wish I had back when I started building my business and growing my family. Women will be able to benefit from all the lessons I learned the hard way, hopefully without making the same mistakes I did.
Nicole: What do you hope people take away from reading it?
Jaime; I want them to realize that it is possible to “have it all.” You will be inspired but also have tons of practical ideas and tools to juggle it all. You will learn how to create a strong and compelling vision for your life and a plan to achieve it. You will learn effective ways to transform yourself into an effective leader and how to get past some of the traps causing you to plateau. I want to help them build long-term happiness into their busy schedule and how to balance everything on their busy plate. I want them to have more fun while doing it. This book will also give ideas for self care and how to improve energy levels and diet.
More than anything, I want you to know you can do it. I was a poor girl from Montana, who lived in a trailer. I grew up on welfare and had no examples of success around me. My life today is much different than what it should have been. I have a dream life – a successful business that makes money whether or not I decide to show up and work, we are completely financially independent, and I can spend as much time as I want with my family. My idea of “Happy & Strong” may not be exactly like yours, but I want to empower and equip more women (and men) to seek out their own version. If I can do it, you can do it. One of my biggest dreams is to touch 100 million lives, and this book is just a small piece of that bigger vision.
Nicole: I see you are a philanthropist! How does that work inspire you?
Jaime: Yes, there are so many amazing causes out there that are worthy of our time and attention. I’m on the board of a few charities as well. I love doing fun service projects in the community with my kids. I know service and charity is a great way to stay humble and happy. I love being able to help others, and I feel so grateful and blessed to be in a financial position with the time AND resources to be able to give back, especially those who really need the most help. Most of the major charities I’m involved in are around the education and wellness of children. Whether that is the orphanages and prosperity centers we have in third-world countries to the anti-bullying, autism, or anti-trafficking organizations I help. I feel passionately that we should pour belief into young people and help them thrive. I study the science of happiness and one of the biggest keys to happiness is focusing on others. We all have struggles, adversity, and hardship. Giving back and serving others builds real happiness into our lives.
Nicole: What are you working on now?
Jaime: I’ve been blessed to achieve most of my biggest dreams. I love to travel the world and go on fun adventures with my family. I now have a business plan that goes 100 years past when my husband and I pass away. These are legacy goals. I’m really focused on growing two of my companies. One is financial education to strengthen families. The other is my Happy & Strong program, which provides workshops and online classes. There will be videos, online resources, and live events and retreats. There are classes for women and for couples. My husband and I are very serious about helping people build their ideal life, a life they absolutely adore, full of passion and fulfillment. My vision is to touch 100 million lives, whether that be through the education my team provides for individuals and families, or through philanthropic efforts, or just by helping people be happier and more successful. I want to build and equip leaders. I want to spark a fire of charity in them as well. I want these leaders to also know how to build wealth. If you have money and leadership skills, you can change the world. So maybe one person is passionate about helping build orphanages and clinics in Uganda, another wants to end child sex trafficking, and another is super fired up about helping kids with cystic fibrosis. It doesn’t matter to me. I just want to show you that you can!
Nicole: That’s so powerful! Thank you so much for your time!
About Jaime Villalovos
Jaime Villalovos grew up in rural Montana, the oldest of six kids. She became a successful entrepreneur and seven-figure earner before the age of thirty. She is an active philanthropist, serving on the board of the All for One foundation, as well as anti-bullying and children’s wellness organizations. Jaime is also very active in her community. Her passion is to help people reach their biggest goals while finding true happiness. She lives in Southern California with her husband Shawn and their four children. She loves reading, working out, and traveling the world on fun adventures with her family. Happy and Strong is her first book and will be available nationwide May 17, 2022.
For updates, follow her at: https://happyandstrong.com/