I lost my job one year ago.  Before that, I worked temporary jobs between the economic bust and starting my last job.  Temp workers are treated with a great deal of disrespect.  It doesn’t matter your education level, what you did before, or what they know you are most likely capable of doing, you are a temp and will be treated as a non-entity.  Then, I finally won the lottery and got a permanent job.  Then, I lost that job after almost a year.  They moved it to another state.  Tried to prevent me from getting unemployment by firing me first and saying I couldn’t do the job.  State agency investigated, determined they were full of it, and gave me some months of unemployment which ran out quite some time ago.

I have been helped by family and the church and this month there is no one and no money for rent, utilities, and food.  I just got out to a stint at the hospital for breathing problems, was told I could have died if I hadn’t gotten there when I did.  If I had died, I wouldn’t have to worry about homelessness and hunger.

I think about all of the jobs I have applied to and/or interviewed for.  I was qualified for each and everyone and over qualified for most of them.  I am over 50 with a doctorate degree.  I have been told by a Priest that my worry is killing me and I have to cut it out.  I was getting better.  Then, I realized I will be out of food by Monday.  Guess what?  I am feeling pretty weak again.

Don’t folks that refuse to give older Americans a chance to get back to the world of productivity realize that their refusal to give us a chance just might cost us our lives?  It could be a matter of days now and, while I love the idea of showing myself I can overcome this, that God will be there with money, a job, or something to sustain me (hey who doesn’t love a miracle?), I don’t know if I want that kind of hope any more.  Hope makes you hold on.  Hope makes you feel you are valuable.  Hope makes you believe in the world and yourself.  I am afraid to try to hope any more.  So, now I feel quite willing to let my mind kill me.  Anyone out there listening?

No Name

By No Name

I started this blog in 2012 when I got let go of my first job out of college. Since then, I've continued talking about my job search experience, office politics, unemployment stories written by others, movies I've enjoyed, products I've loved, and more. This blog is about work, life, and everything else in between.

4 thoughts on ““One year and counting” – An Unemployment Story”
  1. One year and counting,
    You asked if anyone was listening, and let me tell you…YES. While I can’t offer much, I can affirm that you are not alone. Unemployment feels so isolating, doesn’t it? The world seems to just pass by, while our mind fills with despair and lies. These lies are not the truth, and a job does not define who we are. Hang on. You have worth. You are valued and loved by God, above all else. I hear you, One Year; unemployment is so full of darkness. But, I pray that you keep fighting.

    Be strong and courageous. Do not fear or be in dread of them, for it is the Lord your God who goes with you. he will not leave you or forsake you.- Deuteronomy 31:6

    Reese

  2. I feel you. I’ve had similar experiences. I’ve been out of work since 2012 and when I have had interviews the potential employer makes me feel so antiquated. It feels all the years of working experience has now disintegrated.

  3. Don’t people realize that the knowledge and wisdom of the older generations are invaluable to teaching the younger generations everything they need to know about the job? Old and young working together is what helps teams succeed.

  4. I can only say that my experience seems to mirror your own. There only seems to be a very selective place where opportunities live. The prospects of building a life for many seem to be a dream of the past. I wish you the absolute best and hope for a turnaround for us all.

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